If i should die
If I should die, think only this of me;
That there's some corner of a foreign field
That is for ever ... Anna... There shall be
In that rich earth a richer dust concealed; Adapted from Rupert Brooke
I have previously mentioned that I know that I will be caught, and that I will not live out my lifespan without being outed. But I have become aware of different angle: what if I do live out my lifespan without being caught? What will happen when I die? I have no reason to worry particularly much about my health. But I am of course aware of my own mortality. And one thing which gives me the horrors is the knowledge, that when I die, Anna will disappear, without ever having existed.
I have no idea when this will happen. It could be tomorrow. It could be in fifty years. But it is for this reason that I am racing against time to set up a website which at least creates some kind of posterity for Anna. I hope that someone reading this will feel something akin to love for Anna as an idea, so that she will have served her purpose. I hope that Anna can be an inspiration for someone. I hope that someone, somewhere in the world, will sing Anna's songs to their beloved. If something about Anna adds a ray of sunshine to someone's life, I will not have existed in vain!